Don't Retract Pack

3 Year Old's Photo Flagged on His Birthday

By Danelle Frisbie © 2011
NIP card altered for Facebook by Lindsey Ward 

Today my son and I celebrated our three years together earthside. It was a blissful, beautiful day packed full of smiles, sunshine, laughter and play. As he reaches this 36 month mark (the stage at which I consider my "baby" to no longer be a "baby") I look back thankful that I've ignored the nay-sayers and have done everything in my power, at each moment along the way, to ensure his 36 months of babyhood have been truly fitting to the unique and wonderful creation that he is.

One of the ways I've protected and provided for him is to nurse on cue, around the clock, and in "child-led weaning" fashion. Now, at three, he follows in the footsteps of billions before him, who tend to taper their nursing needs to night and nap times (or moments of fear, need for comfort, and illness). The sweet breastfeeding baby photos I've come to treasure are becoming fewer, and farther between.

We snapped this one both in celebration of World Breastfeeding Week 2011, and in honor of our 36 months of nursing. Biased, though I am, I rather like it. And I took the opportunity to stand in solidarity with mommas around the world who are posting breastfeeding photos on Facebook this week (among a wide variety of other WBW activities), in an effort to normalize the natural feeding of our young, and empower those around us (in real or virtual life).

It was rather disheartening then, to find that on my son's birthday, a "friend" would have the audacity to reach as low as to flag his photograph. Yet, as promised on the peaceful parenting Facebook page (and on my own private page), when a loving, gentle parenting or educational photo is posted and then flagged -- one that in no way violates Facebook's photo policies -- it will be reposted here, opening up both the photo itself, and the information and conversation to follow, to a much larger audience beyond the walls of Facebook. On behalf of the thousands of additional readers you've now inadvertently impacted in a positive, baby-friendly way, thank you, flag-happy "friend."

And it is in honor of you, dear lactiphobic reader and viewer of my personal photos, that I share this image and the information included with my private Facebook photo, here, publicly.


World Breastfeeding Week 2011 ❤ 36 months of goodness.

World Breastfeeding Week Homepage:

World Health Organization World Breastfeeding Week:

Note: This is my son. And a lovely, normal, natural photo of something all human babies, of all ages, for all of humanity have done - sought nourishment, comfort, health and healing at their mother's breast. So, if you are thinking of flagging it, please instead remove me from your 'friends' (or block me if you feel the need). Thank you.

For those with qualms about the normal duration of human weaning, I'd encourage you to explore the subject a bit more. There are links to various articles and books below. Become informed, if nothing else, for the sake of understanding the species to which you belong.

Natural Weaning

A Natural Age of Weaning

Natural Weaning Age

Watch Your Language

The Joy of Nursing Toddlers Photo Gallery

AAFP Statement Breastfeeding Past Infancy

Mothering Your Nursing Toddler

How Weaning Happens

Breastfeeding Older Children

Adventures in Tandem Nursing


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If you'd like to share any of your "joys of nursing" we'd love to hear from you.
Send to DrMomma.org@gmail.com for possible posting at peaceful parenting.



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57 comments:

  1. ADORABLE picture! I've posted several nursing pictures on my Facebook. They've never been reported or anything but I do get a lot of comments on the extended nursing thing. "She's still breastfeeding?!" By the way, that is an adorable picture, how could anyone find anything "flaggable" in that?! But anyway, congrats to making it to 3 years! I hope we do, 6 months to go for us. =) Good luck with the whole thing, I hope Facebook doesn't delete your picture or give you any trouble.

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  2. What a sweet, beautiful photo! Thank you for sharing it, and showing the world how beautiful, normal and natural it is to breastfeed until babies wean themselves. My 'baby' is 40 months and still going strong. I hope some people do question what the normal age of 'weaning' is for humans by referring to the sources you have provided.

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  3. What a beautiful photo! And of a completely normal activity at that! :)

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  4. What a beautiful photo. Happy birthday little one! :)

    (Thanks for all the links too)

    Nev

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  5. Oh my word, no way!! I'm tearing up over here, how could some coward do this on his birthing day!? (or ever, but more so today!) The picture is beautiful.

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  6. Your picture is very beautiful. But most of all it is Normal and Nurturing. Happy Birthday to your 3 year old. Many blessings to both of you.. ~Victoria~

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  7. Its a beautiful picture!

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  8. Awful that someone would do that, especially on his bday! Whoever you are, you should be ashamed of yourself.

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  9. Talk about an insult - on the one day that you should be celebrating all things perfect about his babyhood and gentle, healthy upbringing.

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  10. The person obviously has issues. If he/she PM's me, I'd be happy to find them a counselor in their area.

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  11. It amazes me how people will hang around on private, personal profiles just to violate others. I'd say they need more kids to keep busy, but the person probably has kids. :/

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  12. So sad and unbelievable! What a sweet photo!

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  13. It really is a beautiful photo (of a beautiful child!). Happy birthday J. Love that 'nursing on facebook' card Lindsey doctored too :-)

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  14. ugh, people suck! :( HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR J!!! ♥

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  15. I'm so sorry :( What a nasty thing to do. Hope the rest of your day was wonderful - wishing you many more happy, healthy years ♥

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  16. :( All the photos have been SO adorable! He is the cutest kid around the 'net!

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  17. Happy birthday to J! Whoever did that should be ashamed.

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  18. Whoever did this ...Karma will be paying you a visit!

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  19. Makes you wonder what could be so messed up with somebody that they would think that was a good idea. Coward. You can bet if they couldn't have done so anonymously they wouldn't have had the yoni to do so. :/

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  20. Who would do such a thing?! Happy Birthday to your cutie though!

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  21. This is just so much worse because it's on his birthday!!! What a downer...jerk!! :( On a happier note, Happy Birthday J and happy birthing day to you, Danelle! I hadn't realized before how close he and DD are in age...she will be 3 on the 23rd :)

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  22. Some people are so ridiculous and petty. So sorry that such pettiness and nastiness has been directed at someone as kind and caring as you. You are such a wonderful person, doing such positive things. Hopefully that person, and others like it will find something more interesting to do with their time, and will leave you alone.

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  23. Some people are so disrespectful! If they dont want to look at his pic, click the dang X button in the right hand upper corner!

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  24. Now the thousands of readers at peaceful parenting will see it. Ha ha, SUCKERS! :P So much for sheltering the masses from seeing NORMAL term nursing, eh?

    I think I may have just seen a normal-term nursing activist shitstorm unleashed... How RAD is that?

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  25. What is with all the Lactophobia? This is such a beautiful photo.

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  26. People are such meanies..If they had a problem with the picture they should just delete as a friend..And that picture is nothing but love and nurturing..

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  27. A beautiful photo...makes you wonder what hurt is in the heart of the person who flagged it.

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  28. I am going to BF my Boy all during his 1st birthday and post them all over stupid facebook!

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  29. Lactivist IntactivistAugust 07, 2011 6:08 AM

    Stop flagging mother's photos!!! If you are this frightened by the normal feeding of human young, it is an issue *you* need to work out - not those caring for their little ones or celebrating their nursing relationships.

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  30. Beautiful photo, very informative links ~ and crazy unfortunate that someone would flag this little one's photo on his birthday.

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  31. such a beautiful photo!! I love that you have turned this around and into a education opportunity. I hope the person has removed themselves from your 'friends'
    I weaned my son at 33 mnths and really regret it so it is lovely to hear that you are still feeding :D

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  32. Awwww, that's a beautiful photo!!!!!

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  33. Happy birthday, little man! So nice that you had mama milk on your special day :)

    I agree, what a lovely photo. I'd send a PM to each of my friends asking who flagged it -- hopefully someone will own up to it.

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  34. That is absolutly a beatutiful picture!!
    I'm late on the post, but would like to contibute our breastfeeding picture (http://asinglemotherbychoice.blogspot.com/2011/08/breastfeeding-awareness-week.html) [I did add that picture in one of my FB albums, though not as my profile picture..]

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  35. beautiful pic , i've had some pics of me feeding my sons removed from Facebook too :(

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  36. That kid is SO stinkin' cute! Good for you mamma!

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  37. Beautiful. Thanks for sharing and modeling a wonderful and natural thing to do.

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  38. He's beautiful! That's what *I* did on MY third birthday, it's likely what my daughter will do on her third birthday. So what's wrong with it!?!!? People need to understand human biology. I don't go around freaking out when they wean their one year olds, why should they freak out when I *don't*?

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  39. WOW. First of all I LOVE that picture. He's adorable.

    Second, you can't even tell it's a breast.

    Third, why would ANYONE take offense at this!!!!!!!

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  40. Beautiful photo!! I wish mine turned out half as artistic as this has. :)
    Great job mama!! :)

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  41. Love! Happy birthday!!

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  42. Gorgeous photo! I love it! I can't believe it was flagged. *sigh* Thank you for all you do to help educate! <3

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  43. I can't believe that someone that you call friend would flag such a beautiful photo.
    Lots of Love and Happy Birthday!

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  44. I am beyond appalled that this beautiful photo would be flagged, when the group "Exposeing Smuts" still exists with over 9,000 people and is a bonafide soft porn page with hundreds of full-nude photos for anyone and everyone to see on Facebook. Obviously something is up here. For those who are equally outraged at the hypocrisy, or if you'd prefer the sexual degradation of women to stay off FB, you may want to report, this page:

    https://www.facebook.com/pages/Exposeing-Smuts/238603429512623

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  45. LOVE the photo! So precious. I need to take more of my growing babe.

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  46. Congratulation on 3 years of nursing! That photo is just beautiful.
    Nineteen years ago, my first nursling self-weaned around his 2nd birthday. Looking back I wonder if I sent vibes to end it. I was young, and ignorant.
    My second nursling and I decided together to end our nursing relationship when she turned 4 - she was not nursing daily and two years tandem was enough for me.
    My "baby" turns 3 next month. He nurses a lot, but I am not anxious for him to wean. I am 41 and don't see more babies in my future.
    Thank you for all you do, for babies and their parents.

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  47. Thank you for taking a stand and not allowing others to pressure you into going against your maternal instinct. Furthermore, thank you for pointing out the sad fact that there are still people who think breastfeeding is something shameful that should be kept hidden.

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  48. Gorgeous Boy!! I still nurse my 33month old.. Just once as he goes to sleep.. The only time he is my baby is then, all other times he's my boy!

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  49. That is a very artistically shot photograph, and it is purely beautiful. The breast is barely even visible, the focus being on the wonderful expression of your child. I hope whoever flagged you sees this link and feels silly.

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  50. Thank you for posting this, I wish i had seen all this support before with my first born 6 years ago, even though I nursed him til he was 4, I was tandem nursing for 2 years, I was a closet nurser for him cause i had negative vibes coming from different directions that it was just not right, in my heart i felt i was doing the right thing but i didn't have the guts to fight them so I stand alone, We have a 2 1/2 month old and i'm tandem nursing again with the 5 hyear old at naps and night time, again though I'm a closet nurser for my older baby..but I will continue because It's our time, it's healthy for him, it helps continue with the bonding and his insecurities he may be going through with new baby..It's just right;)

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  51. Good for you, Momma! I weaned my first son shortly after his second birthday because of pressure from my mother and mother-in-law. I wish I hadn't. I wish I had been more informed. My second weaned himself the day before his first birthday because he was to sick to nurse. By the time he was well again, he was no longer interested. I was heart-broken because I wasn't ready to stop and that is not the way I wanted for us to end it :( While I was nursing him, I made it a point to nurse in public areas, so that maybe, just maybe, it would influence someone to realize it's perfectly normal. I got many glares and stares and people trying to avoid having to walk past me, even though we were completely covered with a sari. So many of my friends think breast feeding is 'disgusting' because, in our modern world, breasts are seen as purely sexual and breast feeding is not seen enough in the media (i.e. movies, t.v. shows, reality t.v.)or real life. So many ignorant young women out there are planning the day to have their baby, having a c-section when they decide it will be their baby's birthday, then sticking a bottle of commercial formula in the babe's mouth as soon as it is born. Thank you for taking a stand!

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  52. That is a GORGEOUS photo of a nursing cutie...and as you said ON YOUR PRIVATE FB....some people! But glad u reposted for us {I certainly appreciate it as a nursing mom myself}Happy Birthday little one!

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  53. Aww Danelle, his freckles are so adorable... He is such a precious boy! thank you so much, I am nursing 2.5 years and this pic makes me feel better about going to three with her..

    Margaret Diaz

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  54. so cool! And way to make a stand! not only is it helping you and your little one but loads of other mothers and their families too! I have never understood the problems some people find with breastfeeding. it really doesn't make sense to me. Im an artist and i love depicting self love and acceptance and, to me, the female form is the best way for me to express it. but that has led to some seriously nasty comments and photo flags.

    its like they don't understand that its not about being exposed, its the meaning behind it. for me it was about self love not clothes or accessories or makeup. And its not really about breasts, its about a mothers love for and need to take care of her little one.
    its unfortunate that when some people see the female body they automatically think of sex.

    Extended breastfeeding doesn't bother me. I think its great, actually! my family isn't too into that one. actually they prefer a woman cover up at any stage...when i have kids thats gonna change. Gotta make a stand!

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