Images via @jojofordillustration
Your Happy Baby in a Natural Habitat: Carry Mammals
Such a beautiful and perfect explanation. 💕 Humans are carry mammals, and babies instinctively need to be cared for as such, for their baseline level of well-being and development.
Why African Babies Don't Cry
By J. Claire K. Niala
Read more from Niala at In Culture Parent
Why African Babies Don't Cry
I was born and grew up in Kenya and Cote d’Ivoire. From the age of fifteen I lived in the UK. However, I always knew that I wanted to raise my children (whenever I had them) at home in Kenya. And yes, I assumed I was going to have them. I am a modern African woman, with two university degrees, and a fourth generation working woman – but when it comes to children, I am typically African. The assumption remains that you are not complete without them; children are a blessing which would be crazy to avoid. Actually the question does not even arise.
I started my pregnancy in the UK. The urge to deliver at home was so strong that I sold my practice, setup a new business and moved house and country within five months of finding out I was pregnant. I did what most expectant mothers in the UK do – I read voraciously: Our Babies, Ourselves, Unconditional Parenting, anything by Sears – the list goes on. (My grandmother later commented that babies don’t read books and really all I needed to do was “read” my baby). Everything I read said that African babies cried less than European babies. I was intrigued as to why.
When I went home, I observed. I looked out for mothers and babies and they were everywhere, though very young African ones, under six weeks, were mainly at home. The first thing I noticed is that despite their ubiquitousness, it is actually quite difficult to actually “see” a Kenyan baby. They are usually incredibly well wrapped up before being carried or strapped onto their mother (sometimes father). Even older babies strapped onto a back are further protected from the elements by a large blanket. You would be lucky to catch sight of a limb, never mind an eye or nose. The wrapping is a womb-like replication. The babies are literally cocooned from the stresses of the outside world into which they are entering.
My second observation was a cultural one. In the UK, it was understood that babies cry. In Kenya, it was quite the opposite. The understanding is that babies don’t cry. If they do – something is horribly wrong and something must be done to rectify it immediately. My English sister-in-law summarized it well. “People here,” she said, “really don’t like babies crying, do they?”
It all made much more sense when I finally delivered and my grandmother came from the village to visit. As it happened, my baby did cry a fair amount. Exasperated and tired, I forgot everything I had ever read and sometimes joined in the crying too. Yet for my grandmother it was simple, “Nyonyo (breastfeed her)!” It was her answer to every single peep.
There were times when it was a wet nappy, or that I had put her down, or that she needed burping, but mainly she just wanted to be at the breast – it didn’t really matter whether she was feeding or just having a comfort moment. I was already wearing her most of the time and co-sleeping with her, so this was a natural extension to what we were doing.
I suddenly learned the not-so-difficult secret of the joyful silence of African babies. It was a simple needs-met symbiosis that required a total suspension of ideas of what should be happening and an embracing of what was actually going on in that moment. The bottom line was that my baby fed a lot – far more than I had ever read about and at least five times as much as some of the stricter feeding schedules I had seen.
At about four months, when a lot of urban mothers start to introduce solids as previous guidelines had recommended, my daughter returned to newborn-style hourly breastfeeding, which was a total shock. Over the past four months, the time between feeds had slowly started to increase. I had even started to treat the odd patient without my breasts leaking or my daughter’s nanny interrupting the session to let me know my daughter needed a feed.
Most of the mothers in my mother and baby group had duly started to introduce baby rice (to stretch the feeds) and all the professionals involved in our children’s lives – pediatricians, even doulas, said that this was ok. Mothers needed rest too, we had done amazingly to get to four months exclusively breastfeeding, and they assured us our babies would be fine. Something didn’t ring true for me and even when I tried, half-heartedly, to mix some pawpaw (the traditional weaning food in Kenya) with expressed milk and offer it to my daughter, she was having none of it.
So I called my grandmother. She laughed and asked if I had been reading books again. She carefully explained how breastfeeding was anything but linear. “She’ll tell you when she’s ready for food – and her body will too.”
“What will I do until then?” I was eager to know.
“You do what you did before, regular nyonyo.” So my life slowed down to what felt like a standstill again. While many of my contemporaries marveled at how their children were sleeping longer now that they had introduced baby rice and were even venturing to other foods, I was waking hourly or every two hours with my daughter and telling patients that the return to work wasn’t panning out quite as I had planned.
I soon found that quite unwittingly, I was turning into an informal support service for other urban mothers. My phone number was doing the rounds and many times while I was feeding my baby I would hear myself uttering the words, “Yes, just keep feeding him/ her. Yes, even if you have just fed them. Yes, you might not even manage to get out of your pajamas today. Yes, you still need to eat and drink like a horse. No, now might not be the time to consider going back to work if you can afford not to.” And finally, I assured mothers, “It will get easier.” I had to just trust this last one as it hadn’t gotten easier for me, yet.
A week or so before my daughter turned five months, we traveled to the UK for a wedding and for her to meet family and friends. Because I had very few other demands, I easily kept up her feeding schedule. Despite the disconcerted looks of many strangers as I fed my daughter in many varied public places (most designated breastfeeding rooms were in restrooms which I just could not bring myself to use), we carried on.
At the wedding, the people whose table we sat at noted, “She is such an easy baby – though she does feed a lot.” I kept my silence. Another lady commented, “Though I did read somewhere that African babies don’t cry much.” I could not help but laugh.
My Grandmother’s gentle wisdom:
1. Offer the breast every single moment that your baby is upset – even if you have just fed her.
2. Co-sleep. Many times you can feed your baby before they are fully awake, which will allow them to go back to sleep easier and get you more rest.
3. Always take a flask of warm water to bed with you at night to keep you hydrated and the milk flowing.
4. Make feeding your priority (especially during growth spurts) and get everyone else around you to do as much as they can for you. There is very little that cannot wait.
Read your baby, not the books. Breastfeeding is not linear – it goes up and down and also in circles. You are the expert on your baby’s needs.
Dr. J. Claire K. Niala is a mother, writer and osteopath who enjoys exploring the differences that thankfully still exist between various cultures around the world. She was born in Kenya and grew up in Kenya, Cote d'Ivoire and the UK. She has worked and lived on three continents and has visited at least one new country every year since she was 12 years old. Her favorite travel companions are her mother and daughter whose stories and interest in others bring her to engage with the world in ways she would have never imagined. Read more from Niala at In Culture Parent.
Read more from Niala at In Culture Parent
Why African Babies Don't Cry
I was born and grew up in Kenya and Cote d’Ivoire. From the age of fifteen I lived in the UK. However, I always knew that I wanted to raise my children (whenever I had them) at home in Kenya. And yes, I assumed I was going to have them. I am a modern African woman, with two university degrees, and a fourth generation working woman – but when it comes to children, I am typically African. The assumption remains that you are not complete without them; children are a blessing which would be crazy to avoid. Actually the question does not even arise.
I started my pregnancy in the UK. The urge to deliver at home was so strong that I sold my practice, setup a new business and moved house and country within five months of finding out I was pregnant. I did what most expectant mothers in the UK do – I read voraciously: Our Babies, Ourselves, Unconditional Parenting, anything by Sears – the list goes on. (My grandmother later commented that babies don’t read books and really all I needed to do was “read” my baby). Everything I read said that African babies cried less than European babies. I was intrigued as to why.
photo by Andy Graham
When I went home, I observed. I looked out for mothers and babies and they were everywhere, though very young African ones, under six weeks, were mainly at home. The first thing I noticed is that despite their ubiquitousness, it is actually quite difficult to actually “see” a Kenyan baby. They are usually incredibly well wrapped up before being carried or strapped onto their mother (sometimes father). Even older babies strapped onto a back are further protected from the elements by a large blanket. You would be lucky to catch sight of a limb, never mind an eye or nose. The wrapping is a womb-like replication. The babies are literally cocooned from the stresses of the outside world into which they are entering.
My second observation was a cultural one. In the UK, it was understood that babies cry. In Kenya, it was quite the opposite. The understanding is that babies don’t cry. If they do – something is horribly wrong and something must be done to rectify it immediately. My English sister-in-law summarized it well. “People here,” she said, “really don’t like babies crying, do they?”
It all made much more sense when I finally delivered and my grandmother came from the village to visit. As it happened, my baby did cry a fair amount. Exasperated and tired, I forgot everything I had ever read and sometimes joined in the crying too. Yet for my grandmother it was simple, “Nyonyo (breastfeed her)!” It was her answer to every single peep.
I suddenly learned the not-so-difficult secret of the joyful silence of African babies. It was a simple needs-met symbiosis that required a total suspension of ideas of what should be happening and an embracing of what was actually going on in that moment. The bottom line was that my baby fed a lot – far more than I had ever read about and at least five times as much as some of the stricter feeding schedules I had seen.
At about four months, when a lot of urban mothers start to introduce solids as previous guidelines had recommended, my daughter returned to newborn-style hourly breastfeeding, which was a total shock. Over the past four months, the time between feeds had slowly started to increase. I had even started to treat the odd patient without my breasts leaking or my daughter’s nanny interrupting the session to let me know my daughter needed a feed.
Most of the mothers in my mother and baby group had duly started to introduce baby rice (to stretch the feeds) and all the professionals involved in our children’s lives – pediatricians, even doulas, said that this was ok. Mothers needed rest too, we had done amazingly to get to four months exclusively breastfeeding, and they assured us our babies would be fine. Something didn’t ring true for me and even when I tried, half-heartedly, to mix some pawpaw (the traditional weaning food in Kenya) with expressed milk and offer it to my daughter, she was having none of it.
photo by H. Anenden
So I called my grandmother. She laughed and asked if I had been reading books again. She carefully explained how breastfeeding was anything but linear. “She’ll tell you when she’s ready for food – and her body will too.”
“What will I do until then?” I was eager to know.
“You do what you did before, regular nyonyo.” So my life slowed down to what felt like a standstill again. While many of my contemporaries marveled at how their children were sleeping longer now that they had introduced baby rice and were even venturing to other foods, I was waking hourly or every two hours with my daughter and telling patients that the return to work wasn’t panning out quite as I had planned.
I soon found that quite unwittingly, I was turning into an informal support service for other urban mothers. My phone number was doing the rounds and many times while I was feeding my baby I would hear myself uttering the words, “Yes, just keep feeding him/ her. Yes, even if you have just fed them. Yes, you might not even manage to get out of your pajamas today. Yes, you still need to eat and drink like a horse. No, now might not be the time to consider going back to work if you can afford not to.” And finally, I assured mothers, “It will get easier.” I had to just trust this last one as it hadn’t gotten easier for me, yet.
A week or so before my daughter turned five months, we traveled to the UK for a wedding and for her to meet family and friends. Because I had very few other demands, I easily kept up her feeding schedule. Despite the disconcerted looks of many strangers as I fed my daughter in many varied public places (most designated breastfeeding rooms were in restrooms which I just could not bring myself to use), we carried on.
At the wedding, the people whose table we sat at noted, “She is such an easy baby – though she does feed a lot.” I kept my silence. Another lady commented, “Though I did read somewhere that African babies don’t cry much.” I could not help but laugh.
My Grandmother’s gentle wisdom:
1. Offer the breast every single moment that your baby is upset – even if you have just fed her.
2. Co-sleep. Many times you can feed your baby before they are fully awake, which will allow them to go back to sleep easier and get you more rest.
3. Always take a flask of warm water to bed with you at night to keep you hydrated and the milk flowing.
4. Make feeding your priority (especially during growth spurts) and get everyone else around you to do as much as they can for you. There is very little that cannot wait.
Read your baby, not the books. Breastfeeding is not linear – it goes up and down and also in circles. You are the expert on your baby’s needs.
photo by E.B. Sylvester
Dr. J. Claire K. Niala is a mother, writer and osteopath who enjoys exploring the differences that thankfully still exist between various cultures around the world. She was born in Kenya and grew up in Kenya, Cote d'Ivoire and the UK. She has worked and lived on three continents and has visited at least one new country every year since she was 12 years old. Her favorite travel companions are her mother and daughter whose stories and interest in others bring her to engage with the world in ways she would have never imagined. Read more from Niala at In Culture Parent.
~~~~
10 Things Everyone Should Know About Babies
Have you noticed all the stressed babies? Maybe 1 in 30 I see has glowing eyes, which I take as a sign of thriving. What's up? Perhaps ignorance about babies and their needs. Here are 10 things to know.
1. Babies are social mammals with social mammalian needs. Social mammals emerged more than 30 million years ago with intensive parenting(a developmental nest or niche). This is one of the many (extra-genetic) things that evolved other than genes. This developmental nest matches up with the maturational schedule and thus is required for an individual to develop optimally. Intensive parenting practices for babies include years of breastfeeding to develop brain and body systems, nearly constant touch and physical presence of caregivers, responsiveness to needs preventing distress, free play with multi-aged playmates, and soothing perinatal experiences. Each of these has significant effects on physical health.
2. Human babies are born "half-baked" and require an external womb. Humans are born way early compared to other animals: nine months early in terms of mobility and 18 months early in terms of bone development and foraging capacities. Full-term babies have 25% of adult brain volume and most of it grows in the first five years. Thus, the human nest for its young evolved to be even more intense than for other social mammals because of the underdeveloped newborn, lasting for three to five years. Humans also added to the list of expected care a village of positive social support for both mother and baby. (Actually, human brain development lasts into the third decade of life, suggesting that social support and mentoring continue at least that long.)
3. If adults mess up on the post-birth “baking,” long-term problems can result. Each of the caregiving practices mentioned above has longterm effects on the physical health but also the social health of the individual. For example, distressing babies regularly or intensively (by not giving them what they need) undermines self-regulatory systems. This is common knowledge in other cultures and was so in our past. In Spanish, there is a term used for adolescents and adults who misbehave: malcriado (misraised).
4. Babies thrive on affectionate love. When babies receive food and diaper changes and little else, they die. If they receive partial attention and stay alive, it is still not enough—they won’t reach their full potential. Urie Bronfenbrenner, who emphasized the multiple systems of support that foster optimal development, said that babies do best when at least one person is crazy about them. Others have noted that children grow best with three affectionate, consistent caregivers. In fact, babies expect more than mom and dad for loving care. Babies are ready for a community of close, responsive caregivers that includes mother nearby.
5. Babies’ right hemisphere of the brain is developing rapidly in the first three years. The right hemisphere develops in response to face-to-face social experience, with extended shared eye gaze. The right hemisphere governs several self-regulatory systems. If babies are placed in front of screens, ignored or isolated, they are missing critical experiences.
6. Babies expect to play and move. Babies expect to be “in arms” or on the body of the caregiver most of the time. Skin-to-skin contact is a calming influence. After learning this one of my students when at a family gathering took a crying baby and held it to his neck, which calmed it down. Babies expect companionship not isolation or intrusion. They expect to be in the middle of community social life. They are ready to play from birth. Play is a primary method for learning self-control and social skills. Companionship care—friendship, mutual responsiveness, and playfulness—builds social and practical intelligence. Babies and caregivers share intersubjective states, building the child’s capacities for the interpersonal “dances” that fill social life.
7. Babies have built-in warning systems. If they are not getting what they need, babies let you know. It is best, as most cultures have long known, to respond to a baby’s grimace or gesture and not to wait till crying occurs. Young babies have difficulty stopping crying once it starts. The best advice for baby care is to sensitively follow the baby, not the experts.
8. Babies lock their experiences into procedural memory vaults that will be inaccessible but apparent in later behavior and attitudes. Babies can be toxically stressed from neglecting the list of needs above. They won’t forget. It will undermine their trust of others, their health, and social wellbeing, and lead to self-centered morality which can do much destruction to the world.
9. Culture does not erase the evolved needs babies have. Babies cannot retract their mammalian needs. Yet, some adult cultures advocate violating evolved baby needs as if they do not matter and despite the protests of the baby. Everyday violations include baby isolation like sleeping alone, “crying it out” sleep training, infant formula, or baby videos and flashcards.* When violations occur regularly, at critical time periods or are intense, they undermine optimal development. These violations are encoded in the baby’s body as the optimal development of systems is undermined (e.g., immunity, neurotransmitters, endocrine systems like oxytocin). Surprisingly, some developmental psychologists think it fine to violate these needs** in order for the child to fit into the culture.
The rationalization of “culture over biology” reflects a lack of understanding not only of human nature but of optimal development. This has occurred in laboratories with other animals whose natures were misunderstood. For example, Harry Harlow, known for his experiments with monkeys and “mother love,” at first did not realize he was raising abnormal monkeys when he isolated them in cages. Similarly, at least one of the aggressive rat strains used in lab studies today was first created when scientists isolated offspring after birth, again not realizing the abnormality of isolation. Note how the cultural assumptions of the scientists created the abnormal animals. So it matters what cultural assumptions you have.
The culture-over-biology view may be doing the same thing with human beings. By not understanding babies and their needs, we are creating species-atypical human beings. We can only know this to be the case in light of knowledge about human beings who develop under evolved conditions (the "developmental nest" described in point 1): typically, small-band hunter-gatherers. They are wiser, more perceptive and virtuous than we humans in the U.S. today (see note below).
Thus, the final point:
10. Experiences that consistently violate evolution undermine human nature. When species-atypical childrearing occurs, we end up with people whose health and sociality are compromised (which we can see all over the USA today with epidemics of depression, anxiety, high suicide and drug use rates***). Such mis-raised creatures might do all right on achievement tests or IQ measures, but they may also be dangerous reptiles whose world revolves around themselves. A lot of smart reptiles (“snakes in suits”) on Wall Street and elsewhere have been running the country into the ground.
What to do?
- Inform others about the needs of babies.
- Be aware of the needs of babies around you and interact sensitively with the babies you encounter.
- Support parents to be sensitive to the needs of their babies. This will also require many more institutional and social supports for families with children, including extensive parental leave which other developed nations provide. It's an uphill battle right now but raising awareness is the first step.
- Read and learn from books that convey the evolved principles of caregiving.
*Note that sometimes violations (e.g., formula, isolation) are required under emergency conditions that are matters of life and death. Also note: In a way, U.S. culture forces parents into these violations because there is no extended family or community support to help provide for all the many needs of a baby.
**Of course they don’t think it’s a violation because they don’t take the set of mammalian needs seriously.
***In the U.S., everyone under 50 has numerous health disadvantages compared to citizens in 16 other developed nations (National Research Council, 2013).
Note: Of course, every human community is not perfect but when you provide young children with their basic needs, they are less aggressive and self-centered. They are less preoccupied with what they want because they got all they wanted when they needed it in early life. The baby nest described above makes for a smart, healthy, well-functioning body and brain, with high emotional intelligence and self-control. They are more socially skilled and empathic toward others. All this makes getting along with others so much easier. All this will have to be explained more thoroughly in another post, citing the anthropology research that shows what people in small-band hunter-gatherer communities are like.
Related Reading by Dr. Narvaez at Peaceful Parenting:
An 'On Demand' Life and the Basic Needs of Babies
Where Are All the Happy Babies?
10 Things Everyone Should Know About Babies
12 Ways to Nurture Babies at Conception, Birth, and Beyond
Are you treating your child like a prisoner?
Are you or your child on a touch starvation diet?
Conspiracy Thinking: Understanding Attachment and Its Consequences
Psychology Today: Circumcision Series
Learn More from Narvaez:
Neurobiology and the Development of Human Morality: Evolution, Culture, and Wisdom
💜 Peaceful Parenting Community
💙 Peaceful Parenting on Facebook
💗 Peaceful Parenting on Telegram
Research everything!
The Vital Babymoon
What is a babymoon?
Babymoon is a term first used by social anthropologist, and mother/baby advocate, Sheila Kitzinger, in her 1994 book, The Year After Childbirth: Surviving and Enjoying the First Year of Motherhood. It refers to the postpartum bonding period between parents and their new baby, and is especially crucial for a mother and her new little one.
It is at this time, and especially during the first 40 days following birth, that a mom and her baby do best cocooning at home together in their own 'nest' as they establish breastfeeding, sleep and nap together, and fall deeply in love.
During her babymoon, mom learns to read her baby’s cues (preventing unnecessary tears and fears for baby - and for mom), and it is the time that secure attachment begins to develop between a baby and parents because of their tuned-in responsiveness. Infants learn that the world can be trusted, that they are loved, not ignored.
Oxytocin flows freely for a supported mother who is cared for herself, and this feel-good love hormone floods her baby as well when kept close within a newborn’s natural habitat: mom’s chest.
During the vital babymoon, milk supply is built and regulated, and baby’s respiration, cardiovascular functioning, hormones, and temperature are stabilized by being close to mom. The babymoon is a sacred period, and one that each mother and her baby deserve to fully savor and be supported through. This is one time that we do not wish to disrupt the primal process of mothering.
Related Reading:
Natural Family Today: The Importance of a Babymoon (article)
BlissTree Babymoon (article)
Her Family: Importance of a Babymoon (article)
Bella: The Importance of a Babymoon (article)
Why African Babies Don't Cry (article)
Why Love Matters (book)
The Continuum Concept (book)
Baby Matters (book)
The Biology of Love (book)
Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering (book)
How to Care for Your Intact Son
Among both boys and girls, before natural retraction, the prepuce (foreskin/hood) is tightly adhered to the glans (head) of the penis/clitoris, in the same way your fingernail is tightly adhered to your finger. If you stick things under your fingernail, try to pull it back, or otherwise 'mess' with it, you are bound to not only be in pain, but also fester irritation and/or infection. The same is true with the prepuce organ (the clitoral hood in girls and the foreskin in boys).
In addition, the prepuce serves the function of protection over the glans in much the same way your eye lids protect your eye balls. The temperature, moisture, pH balance, enzyme level, antivirals, and more are all regulated because the glans is meant to be an internal organ - just as our eyeballs are also internal organs. We'd never scrub under our eyelids and not expect some severe and painful (possibly infectious) consequences.
Remember: INTACT=DON'T RETRACT! ONLY CLEAN WHAT IS SEEN!
One friend, a pediatrician, tells parents, "The ONLY thing you need to care for your intact son's penis is a ruler -- to slap the hand of anyone who attempts to touch his foreskin."
Below are additional resources for parents of intact boys. Know the myths, and be informed enough to protect your son and his genital integrity.
If you're a pro-intact physician, PA or midwife willing to field an occasional question,
write to SavingSons@gmail.com to join the MedPro advisory board.
RETRACTION
Should My Baby's Foreskin Be Retracted? Dr. Antier Responds
DrMomma.org/2012/08/should-babys-foreskin-be-retracted.html
Hands Off My Foreskin! Dr. Martin Winckler on the Care of Baby Boys
DrMomma.org/2013/02/hands-off-my-foreskin-dr-martin.html
Forced Retraction: Don't Let it Happen to Your Son
DrMomma.org/2010/11/forced-retraction-dont-let-it-happen-to.html
Forced Retraction: Now What?
DrMomma.org/2009/12/forced-retraction-what-now.html
Don't Retract Clinician Pack (for physicians and medical staff; includes links to the AAP, RCH and CPS organization care statements):
SavingSons.org/2015/07/retracting-clinician-information-pack.html
Using a Catheter Without Retraction: My Nurse Did It and So Can Yours!
SavingSons.org/2013/01/using-catheter-without-retraction-my.html
Only Clean What is Seen: Reversing the Epidemic of Forced Retraction:
DrMomma.org/2009/09/only-clean-what-is-seen-reversing.html
Medical Testing: Do Not Retract:
DrMomma.org/2009/09/uti-testing-on-boys-do-not-retract.html
Doctors Opposing Circumcision Statement for Physicians and Nurses on
Forced Retraction:
Doctorsopposingcircumcision.org/info/info-forcedretraction.html
Forced Retraction: Ask the Experts
DrMomma.org/2009/09/ask-experts-forced-foreskin-retraction.html
The Forced Retraction of My Son [One Parent's Story]
DrMomma.org/2011/07/forced-retraction-of-my-son.html
Medical Organization Statements on Intact Care (and Physician 'Do Not Retract' Packs):
SavingSons.org/2015/07/retracting-clinician-information-pack.html
Hospital Intact Care Packs ($3):
https://www.etsy.com/listing/526265909/hospital-stay-packet?ref=shop_home_active_4
Baby Bands (soft and stretchy for the hospital or care providers):
https://www.etsy.com/listing/502616895/do-not-retract-do-not-circumcise-baby?ref=listing-shop-header-3
How to Care for Your Intact Son [Homepage]
DrMomma.org/2009/06/how-to-care-for-intact-penis-protect.html
Intact: Healthy, Happy, Whole [Facebook Group]
FB.com/groups/IntactHealthy
Basic Care of the Intact Child:
DrMomma.org/2010/01/basic-care-of-intact-child.html
Protect Your Intact Son: Medical Advice for Parents When Your Doctor Says to Circumcise:
DrMomma.org/2009/08/protect-your-uncircumcised-son-expert.html
The Functions of the Foreskin:
DrMomma.org/2009/09/functions-of-foreskin-purposes-of.html
Natural Foreskin Retraction in Intact Children and Teens
DrMomma.org/2008/04/natural-foreskin-retraction-in-intact.html
Adult Intact Penis Care:
SavingSons.org/2015/09/adult-intact-penis-care.html
Phony Phimosis Diagnosis:
DrMomma.org/2010/01/phony-phimosis-diagnosis.html
Urine Sampling and Catheter Insertion for the Intact Boy
DrMomma.org/2011/12/urine-samples-and-catheter-insertion.html
Using a Catheter without Retraction: My Nurse Did It, Yours Can Too:
SavingSons.org/2013/01/using-catheter-without-retraction-my.html
Deep, dark, red, purple or blue: the normal glans in the intact child:
DrMomma.org/2014/12/deep-dark-red-purple-or-blue-normal.html
UTI (Urinary Tract Infections) Resource Page: SavingSons.org/2014/11/uti-resource-page.html
Yeast, Rash and Redness: Breastmilk Spurs Yeast Overgrowth, Neosporin Alters Microflora; What to Do Instead:
DrMomma.org/2014/04/yeast-rash-and-redness-breastmilk-spurs.html
Swimming, Suits and Mesh: Cut the Lining of Your Child's Suit to Decrease Irritation Potential: DrMomma.org/2014/06/swimming-suits-mesh-cut-lining-of-your.html
Intact Care (and No Retraction) Agreement (Parents to Clinicians): DrMomma.org/2014/10/intact-care-and-no-retraction-agreement.html
Raising Intact Sons:
DrMomma.org/2009/11/raising-intact-sons.html
Foreskin: It's Not 'Icky':
DrMomma.org/2010/12/foreskin-its-not-icky.html
How the Foreskin Protects Against UTI:
DrMomma.org/2009/12/how-foreskin-protects-against-uti.html
Painful Urination During Prepuce Separation
DrMomma.org/2010/01/painful-urination-during-
Ballooning in the Intact Child:
DrMomma.org/2011/06/ballooning-in-intact-child.html
Extreme Ballooning: This, too, is normal:
SavingSons.org/2014/03/extreme-ballooning-in-intact-child.html
Extreme Ballooning: This, too, is normal:
SavingSons.org/2014/03/extreme-ballooning-in-intact-child.html
Questions Regarding Normal Separation of the Prepuce:
DrMomma.org/2010/01/common-questions-regarding-normal.html
Hypospadias: Surgery and Circumcision:
DrMomma.org/2010/04/hypospadias-surgery-and-circumcision.html
National Organization of Circumcision Information Resource Centers - care of the intact penis:
http://www.nocirc.org/publish/4pam.pdf
Penile Hygiene for Intact Males (Circumcision Information Resource Pages):
http://www.cirp.org/library/hygiene/
American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) Care of the Intact Child
http://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/baby/bathing-skin-care/pages/Care-for-an-Uncircumcised-Penis.aspx
Medical Organization Statements on Intact Care (and Physician Packs):
SavingSons.org/2015/07/retracting-clinician-information-pack.html
Hospital Intact Care Packs ($3):
https://www.etsy.com/listing/526265909/hospital-stay-packet?ref=shop_home_active_4
Baby Bands (soft and stretchy for the hospital or care providers):
https://www.etsy.com/listing/502616895/do-not-retract-do-not-circumcise-baby?ref=listing-shop-header-3
CIRCUMCISION CARE
Cloth Diapering Your Baby After Circumcision: DrMomma.org/2016/04/cloth-diapering-your-baby-after.html
Circumcision Care (National Organization of Circumcision Information Resource Centers): http://www.nocirc.org/publish/pamphlet5.html
Note regarding the recommendation of 6 months jelly for post-circumcision care:
In summary, this RCT demonstrated that an easy, safe, cheap, widely available intervention (petroleum jelly) reduces some of early and late complications of circumcision. It is prudent to apply the petroleum jelly on glans and meatal area of circumcised boys after each diaper change for 6 months post-circumcision.
Bazmamoun, H., Ghorbanpour, M., and Mousavi-Bahar, S. H. (2008). Lubrication of circumcision site for prevention of meatal stenosis in children younger than 2 years old. Urology journal, 5(4), 233-236.
Full Text: http://urologyjournal.org/index.php/uj/article/viewFile/30/29
Similar articles:
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3830142/
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9539919
Intact Info Cards in English or Spanish available at Etsy.Hypospadias: Surgery and Circumcision:
DrMomma.org/2010/04/hypospadias-surgery-and-circumcision.html
National Organization of Circumcision Information Resource Centers - care of the intact penis:
http://www.nocirc.org/publish/4pam.pdf
Penile Hygiene for Intact Males (Circumcision Information Resource Pages):
http://www.cirp.org/library/hygiene/
American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) Care of the Intact Child
http://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/baby/bathing-skin-care/pages/Care-for-an-Uncircumcised-Penis.aspx
Medical Organization Statements on Intact Care (and Physician Packs):
SavingSons.org/2015/07/retracting-clinician-information-pack.html
Hospital Intact Care Packs ($3):
https://www.etsy.com/listing/526265909/hospital-stay-packet?ref=shop_home_active_4
Baby Bands (soft and stretchy for the hospital or care providers):
https://www.etsy.com/listing/502616895/do-not-retract-do-not-circumcise-baby?ref=listing-shop-header-3
CIRCUMCISION CARE
Cloth Diapering Your Baby After Circumcision: DrMomma.org/2016/04/cloth-diapering-your-baby-after.html
Circumcision Care (National Organization of Circumcision Information Resource Centers): http://www.nocirc.org/publish/pamphlet5.html
Note regarding the recommendation of 6 months jelly for post-circumcision care:
In summary, this RCT demonstrated that an easy, safe, cheap, widely available intervention (petroleum jelly) reduces some of early and late complications of circumcision. It is prudent to apply the petroleum jelly on glans and meatal area of circumcised boys after each diaper change for 6 months post-circumcision.
Bazmamoun, H., Ghorbanpour, M., and Mousavi-Bahar, S. H. (2008). Lubrication of circumcision site for prevention of meatal stenosis in children younger than 2 years old. Urology journal, 5(4), 233-236.
Full Text: http://urologyjournal.org/index.php/uj/article/viewFile/30/29
Similar articles:
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3830142/
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9539919
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| Diaper Rash or Red Foreskin Care |
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| The perfect bath for healing and soothing |
Hospital packs come with a variety of intact care materials, as well as a pediatric organization statement on care sheet to share with your doctor.
The INTACT Network: Facebook.com/groups/TINFamily
Saving Our Sons: Facebook.com/groups/SavingOurSons
Peaceful Parenting: Facebook.com/groups/ExplorePeacefulParenting
It's A Boy! Facebook.com/groups/OhJoyItsABoy
What if your son is retracting his own foreskin? Boys will tug and play - and it's okay! The foreskin will begin its natural separation process during this early exploration time for most boys. This is normal. Make hand washing fun! If irritation occurs, apply Calmoseptine to the outside of the penis to soothe. No retraction, unless by a boy himself. Further information also at: IntactHealth.org • SavingSons.org
Intact men in America have historically been cared for improperly. It is not the fact that they have foreskin that is sending them into urology offices. It is the fact that their foreskin had been torn away from the glans as infants, causing scar tissue that led to an injury, preventing the foreskin from functioning normally. As long as we are not damaging babies by retracting and tearing the foreskin, this will not be an issue. -Jennifer D'Jamoos, CCCE, Founder, IntactNetwork.org • Medical Professionals for Genital Autonomy
Breastfeeding Badges: Celebrating Milky Milestones
For a number of years breastfeeding moms arriving at peaceful parenting with lactation questions, seeking community, and finding support, have asked for breastfeeding badges to celebrate milestones along the way. This World Breastfeeding Week we are happy to share our badges with the hope that they empower, encourage, and warm many mommas' hearts along the way.
No matter how long you've nursed your baby, you are giving your little one a beautiful start in life - and one that will impact them forevermore.
The design for our breastfeeding badges includes colorful spirals with a glistening of milky white. Danelle Frisbie explains:
The breastfeeding badge spirals represent many things: the circular nature of life and love between a mother and her baby; generations of breastfeeding women before us and those to come; the ebb and flow and flexibility required as both a parent and as a nursing mom; the constant sureness that while we may not see things change moment to moment, they always are; the yin/yang type of opposites that exist in us all - sometimes bubbling forth through our breastfeeding years (anyone who has nursed a 2 or 3 year old will have days they want to quit, or feel touched out, but deeply long at the same time to keep going for the wellbeing of their child - knowing that a natural end in weaning will too quickly arrive, and this will all be gone in the blink of an eye). Spirals have also been used far into antiquity, and to the present day, to represent female energy, power, reproduction, and life-giving -- all of which flow forth in a mother's milk.
We invite you to take and use breastfeeding badges along your own journey, and if you feel like sharing any of your experiences or photos with us, drop a note to DrMomma.org@gmail.com or join the Breastfeeding Group on Facebook.
Wishing you all the milky love this year and beyond!
Breastfeeding badges can also be found on Facebook here.
Multiple Babies Badges
Color request from Mama's Milk, No Chaser.
If you have a badge request, write to ContactDrMomma@gmail.com
or leave a comment request in the Breastfeeding group.
Don't see the badge you need? Drop a note to ContactDrMomma@gmail.com
or comment on the Facebook photo album of breastfeeding badges here.
Pumping Badges
Specialty Badges
Specialty Badges
Black Breastfeeding Week: Aug 25-31
Background image twist on the International Breastfeeding Symbol by Pryia M. Laday.
Top 5 Reasons We Need Black Breastfeeding Week: